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February 27, 2012

Inside my head is a scary place!

So the farrowing barns needed washed this morning and I volunteered - yep volunteered - I needed to get out of the house!

Washing hog barns keeps the hands busy but allows my mind to wander:

*For some reason when I am concentrating my mouth hangs slightly open - not really ideal when water, manure and stale feed are flying thru the air at maximum speed so when I felt something in my mouth I panicked, immediately spit it out and then remembered that I had drank a smoothie for breakfast with raspberries in it and that was probably a raspberry seed - that is the theory I am going with and no one can convince me otherwise!

*Which for some reason then the word foul popped into my head which immediately made me think of chickens (doesn't everyone?) which then caused me to wonder if  "chickens ever sue for 'fowl' working conditions?" and I literally laughed out loud - which then I felt the need to share my joke with everyone so I pulled out my phone and texted Chris, Emily, Ginger and Stacy (in no particular order except alphabetical because that is how they are listed in my phone) -

  My text: Do you think chickens ever sue for fowl working conditions?

Chris' replied first: Your Punny - now get back to work!
  well really just the "your punny" part but I think that was only because it takes him forever to text, I am pretty sure he was thinking the "now get back to work" part

Emily replied basically with "wondered what you were up to today-now I know- if you need to get out of the house you can come visit me" - she thought I was cooped (another chicken joke - I crack -omg crack like an egg -myself up) up in the house, so I cried a little and replied that I was actually out of the house (cried because I consider washing a hog barn getting out of the house) and still apparently not completely mentally stable!

Stacy suggested that maybe I needed a cocktail - that is exactly why I LOVE HER!

But Ginger, oh my sweet Ginger, played along with the simple text of "You CLUCK me up" - and that is why today Ginger is my favorite!

*If I could pressure wash my house it would always be clean - maybe!

*If I ever become a mean person I don't want to be called a bully I prefer the term Thug, I just think it sounds more . . . professional!

*I located my missing kitchen broom, I found it in the feed room, used it to sweep the aisles before washing, I have decided Chris can go ahead and keep it!

*So 2 hours into washing I am worn out - try climbing in and out of farrowing crates on wet floors, keeping your balance with 2800 psi pushing you back - so I thought to myself - WoW I am saving Chris money by doing this because it is like exercise and  not paying not go to a gym and I am getting paid -  then I laughed because I don't exercise let alone pay gym fees but then I cried because I wasn't getting paid!

After I finished washing I came home and of course showered, then my patient asked me to lay with her - how could I say No, I mean she is feeling bad!  She kept asking for her medicine, I kept telling her it wasn't time, she said yes it is, I said no it isn't - I think she has wised up to me cutting her back on her pain meds and she is not happy, she keeps telling me she is at a 5 and NEEDS her medicine - I have a feeling it is going to be a long week!

When the boy got off the bus I threw all my morals out the window and offered to pay him to help me clean the house (which I never do - my kids live in this house, make the mess in this house, they have to help clean the house without pay) I was over the mess and dirt!  He looked me right in the eye and said "Exactly how much cash are we talking about?"  I looked him right in the eye and said "Depends on how hard you work so you can either work and take what I give you or you can work and I will give you a roof over your head, clothes on your back and food on your plate"  he said "Where should I start?" - smart boy!

We had our first 4-H meeting of the year tonight - I am the proud Momma of the Vice President, a health & safety officer and a recreation officer - all 3 kids have an office - I couldn't be prouder!

Good Night!


  1. sadly i love washing hog barns. i love turning something so dirty into something clean. and i was constantly thinking of weird things. maybe its the noise, water and manure! lol
    im glad your babe is getting better. take care.

  2. This cracked me up! Great post. :)

    Maybe I should work on a farm for exercise, who needs a gym?